Pregnancy encyclopedia: Resuming sex after birth to Toxemia

Resuming sex after birth

When you resume sexual activity after the birth of your child is an individual matter.

• The earliest you should have sex is after your vaginal discharge has changed from brownish-red to white or clear. This indicates that your uterus has healed.
• If you have sore stitches or a tear, you may not be ready for sex until after your 6-week checkup or possibly later.
• The hormones of pregnancy and breastfeeding reduce normal vaginal lubrication. Use K-Y Jelly if you need an additional lubricant, but do not use Vaseline, baby oil or mineral oil.
• If your stitches or tear make your vagina very tender, sit in a warm tub of water and stretch your vagina with your fingers. Use a generous amount of lubricant. Try sexual positions like side-to-side or you on top of your partner for a while to put less strain on your incision.
• Try feeding your baby before sex. Your baby may sleep and give you two some time alone.
• If you are breastfeeding, your milk may leak out when you have an orgasm.
• Remember -- even though you have just given birth and may be breastfeeding, you can still get pregnant!
• If you find that sex is still uncomfortable after a few months, talk to your health care provider.
• Talk about your feelings and concerns with your partner.

Rh factor

Just as there are different blood types, like A and B, there is also an Rh factor in everyone's blood. Rh is a type of protein in red blood cells. Most people have it and are "Rh positive." People who do not have it are "Rh negative." Neither state affects your health, but the Rh factor can cause problems for babies.

If you are Rh negative and your baby is Rh positive, the exchange of blood cells between you and your baby will cause your body to produce antibodies that fight Rh positive blood cells. This will not affect your first baby, but in your next Rh positive pregnancy, your antibodies may attack your baby's blood cells, causing brain damage or even death.

However, these problems can almost always be prevented. Your health care provider will test your blood to determine your Rh factor status, and if you are Rh negative, can give you a medicine during pregnancy and after birth that prevents the antibodies from forming.

Sex after birth

-- see Resuming sex after birth

Sickle cell screening

If you are of African, Middle Eastern, Mediterranean, Caribbean, or Asian descent, you may carry the sickle cell trait. If both parents carry it, your baby may have sickle cell anemia, which causes death at an early age.

Social Security number

How do you apply for a Social Security number for your baby?
In most cases, when you or a member of the birth center staff complete the information for your baby's birth certificate during your hospital stay, you will be asked if you want to apply for a Social Security number for your baby. If you say "yes," the state's vital statistics office will automatically share the information with the Social Security Administration, and a Social Security card will be mailed to you. The information is kept strictly confidential. It's as easy as that. If you have not named your baby, a Social Security card cannot be issued.

Do you have to apply as soon as your baby is born?
No. Getting a Social Security number for your baby right after birth is voluntary. You will not automatically get a number. You must ask for one on your baby's birth certificate.

If you don't request a number after birth, you can get one later. Contact the Social Security office nearest you. You'll be asked to provide evidence that you are the child's parent or legal custodian and to provide evidence of your child's age, identity and citizenship.

If you lose your baby's card, the Social Security Administration will replace it at no charge. For more information, call 1-800-772-1213.

What does it cost?
There is no charge. Do not pay any company to send you a Social Security card.

Sore nipples

Try these tips to reduce soreness:

• Use deep breathing, soft music, or other relaxation techniques before and during breastfeeding.
• Nurse on the less sore side first (your baby will nurse more vigorously on the first breast offered).
• Express a little milk before nursing to stimulate the milk to let down (if let-down has already occurred, your baby won't have to nurse as vigorously).
• Massage your breasts while nursing to help stimulate milk flow.
• Use bras and bra pads that do not have a plastic lining.
• Change bra pads often to keep nipples dry.
• If your nipples become dry or cracked, use a little USP-modified lanolin on them to form a moisture barrier.
• Wear multiple-holed breast shields between feedings (this lets the air circulate around your nipples and protects nipples from rubbing on fabric).

It is not normal to experience blisters, cracking, bleeding, and pain that continues during or between feedings. Consult your health care provider or a lactation consultant.

Special care nursery

Your baby might require extra care if he is born premature (before 37 weeks or 8 1/2 months), or if he is born full-term but with special needs. You may or may not have known before labor and birth that your baby would have special needs.

Your range of emotions
After hoping for and dreaming of a healthy baby, having a sick baby may feel like a shattered dream. You may be angry at yourself, your partner, your health care provider, or the hospital staff. You may even feel angry at your baby. You may be afraid that your baby will not live or will never be healthy. All of these feelings are completely normal.

Your baby may be transferred
Your baby may be in a special care nursery or at a neonatal intensive care unit at your hospital, or may have been transferred to a neonatal intensive care unit at a different hospital. Your baby may receive care in one nursery, and then move to another, depending on changes in your baby's condition. Your baby's health care provider will explain to you your baby's needs and the level of care that is required.

Special care nursery staff
In a special care nursery or newborn intensive care unit, a highly trained team of doctors, nurse practitioners, nurses, and support staff provides care, monitoring and observation of your baby.

• Your baby's doctor may be a neonatologist (a doctor who specializes in the care of sick newborns and premature infants) or a neonatal fellow (a fully trained pediatrician who is learning the specialty of neonatalogy).
• Residents (doctors who are training in the specialty of pediatrics or family practice) may help to care for your baby.
• Neonatal nurse practitioners (registered nurses with special training and additional education in newborn care) may assist the doctors. Your baby's nurses will provide close monitoring and specialized care. To provide continuity for both you and your baby, the same nurses may be able to care for your baby whenever they are scheduled to work.
• Other health care professionals, such as respiratory therapists, may help care for your baby.
• Hospital social workers can offer more resources and support.
• Care management specialists are also helpful in planning for bringing your baby home, especially if special equipment or help at home is needed.
• If you wish to breastfeed, the nurses will offer encouragement, support, and information about pumping and storing breast milk until your baby can nurse. A special nurse, called a lactation consultant, educator or counselor, is available to you as special needs arise. The nurses are experts in helping babies and their mothers with nursing.

You are welcome to talk with any of these team members about your feelings and concerns.

• When you first enter a special care nursery, you may be surprised or frightened. You'll be surrounded by many lights, beeping and buzzing sounds, and complicated-looking equipment. The equipment is highly sophisticated and designed to monitor your baby's heartbeat, blood pressure and breathing.
• There may be tubes inserted into a vein in your baby's scalp, belly button, hand, or foot to provide fluids or medicine. An intravenous (IV) pump next to your baby will regulate these fluids.
• A pulse oximeter will measure your baby's oxygen level.
• Ventilators and respirators may be helping your baby breathe.
• Your baby will be cared for in either an open warmer bed or an enclosed heated bed, called an isolette.

Infant massage
Infant massage is a way for you to provide comfort and soothe your baby. This can also play an important role in your baby's growth and development. Massage can increase your baby's alert, awake states and encourage deeper longer sleep. If you want to learn more about the benefits of infant massage, please ask your nurse.

• You can spend as much time with your baby as you like. You can be with your baby day or night. Touch, hold, talk to, and sing to your baby. You are encouraged to participate in caring for your baby and to share your plans/ideas with team members in the nursery.
• Your baby will not forget you. Your baby has been hearing your voices since the early weeks of pregnancy. Your baby knows you and needs you.
• If you have chosen to breastfeed your baby, you'll need to begin pumping your breasts, preferably using a hospital-grade electric pump. Pump every few hours, simulating a baby's typical feeding pattern of nursing eight to 12 times in 24 hours. This will ensure an adequate milk supply for your baby.
• Learn about your baby's capabilities. Even the smallest or sickest baby has amazing strengths.
• Write down your questions as you think of them and ask your nurse or health care provider to find answers for you. Your questions and concerns are welcome. Talk to the hospital staff. Ask frequently about how your baby is doing. Learn what you can do to participate in your baby's care.
• Your partner, family and friends will each handle their emotions about this situation differently. Some may temporarily pull away. Seek out those who can give you the support you need.
• If you have other children, you may feel pulled in many directions at once. Your children may act out their feelings in troublesome ways. Ask the hospital social worker, chaplain, and nursing staff for help. Some hospitals have child life specialists who canoffer support for your other children.
• As hard as it may seem, take some time for yourself. You're recovering from birth or perhaps surgery. You still need rest, nourishment, and tender loving care. Get away from the hospital now and then. When you return, you'll have more energy and be more relaxed. Your baby will sense the change.
• The nursery staff is ready to listen to your feelings, whatever they may be. They can put you in contact with a chaplain, social worker, or a family who has been through a similar situation. Let them help you.
• Grandparents, siblings, and other supportive friends and family are generally permitted to see your baby with your permission. The number of visitors at one time is sometimes limited, due to the size of the nursery. Children other than your baby's siblings are usually not allowed in the nursery.
• You will probably go home before your baby does. Continue to wear your hospital identification bracelet for your baby's protection. When you visit your baby, the staff will check your bracelet and be sure it matches your baby's.
• Wash your hands before you enter the nursery. Your baby's nurse will show you where to wash. Anyone with a cold, sore throat, cough, diarrhea, or other illness should not see your baby.

The time your baby spends in a special care nursery can be difficult for you and your family. It can also be a time of preparation for bringing your baby home.

Toxemia

-- See Preeclampsia


 

First published: 10/04/2002
Last updated: 10/04/2002

Reviewed by: Allina Patient Education, experts