Who should attend the delivery?

Years ago, women had little choice about who would be present at their delivery. Only the woman and the medical personnel could attend. Today, partners, siblings and other family members often accompany the mother during labor and delivery.

It's good to have choices. It's also good to remember that the decision about who will be with you during labor and birth is up to you and your partner.

Discuss your choices with your doctor or midwife before delivery. You may also want to check with the hospital where you'll be having your baby to find out whether it has any rules about the ages and number of people you can have with you.

People who may attend your child's birth might include the following:

The baby's father -- Most couples are together during the birth, and they almost always agree that having the woman's husband/partner present is a tremendous sense of comfort and support.
Childbirth instructor -- If your baby's father will not be present during the birth, your childbirth instructor may be willing to be with you. This can work well, because you have come to know this person as you've gone through your childbirth classes. So if you feel comfortable with your instructor, don't hesitate to ask.
Doula -- A doula can be of great help to you and your partner as you go through labor and birth. Doulas are professionally trained. They can give you advice during the more difficult periods of labor, suggest different positions to try and help you to feel less anxious. Some doulas also help you at home with your baby, depending on the arrangements you make with them.
Siblings -- Whether or not to have siblings present during the birth depends on a lot of factors—their ages and ability to understand what's happening, their temperament and your level of comfort. It can be upsetting for children to see their mother in pain or uncomfortable for you and them to watch the birth. So consider it carefully before having your children there. You may want to have them nearby, so they can see their new brother or sister as soon as possible after the birth.
Other family members and friends -- Friends and family may express interest in being there when you have your baby, and that decision is up to you. If you and your partner like the idea, then you may want to go ahead with it. If you don't, there are ways you can respond that won't hurt anyone's feelings. Consider saying, "We're so glad you'd like to be there, but we've decided to keep it private, a very special time for just the two of us."